Suddenly have a very bad feeling... i knew very long time ago that school would end on 2 nov... tt time i was tinking that, wah lao so long then holidays... now i seem to dread the last day of school..

even though my relationships with classmates in 4B are not as strong as in 2B.. i still feel quite 依依不舍。i'm saying good bye to my secondary life already!!!!! life passes by so quickly... 好像让时间停止前进！转眼间我已经16岁了！再多几年，我就得踏入社会工作了。I'm dreading that........... Can I not grow up? 我不想我不想，不想长大！

I'm going to get separated with all my good friends le... xue ting, lyon, rebecca... just 3 really gd friends, but it's very sad lor... cos they are my really really really really gd friends! not forgetting the other classmates la.. liu jia, chen ying, mei xue, jochebed, jolene lai, siu ling, yifan, jasmine, daphne, huiwen, yao lu and so on la... not forgetting kailin too! i'll really miss crapping with u everyday morning during flag raising... calling each other 老猴子and 死狗... i'll miss crapping with jochebed too... miss talking with xue ting n lyon during class.. miss poking lyon.. miss bickering with xue ting... miss going out with them after we each hav a new group of friends...

haiz feel like crying now... i noe i'll definitely 疏远 them if we were to be in different classes... i noe we often say that "keep in touch ok!" but how often does that happen? haiz i can only say... it's really hard to find a really really gd friend that will stay with u for all ur life... i dun mind just having 1 very gd friend, rather than many friends that will just only wave and say hi to me...

i remember... she and i said before that we will go 北大 to study 中文系 together... we'll be hostel mates... now? believe me la, i'm really sad... but i hav to cut this friendship... or i'll fail my A levels in 2009.. even though i noe i may end up slacking again, but at least i cut away more than half of my chances of going out to play.. at least if i stay at home, it'll be better than i go out to play.. hopefully i'll be affected by others' piaing spirit..

my mum reminded me a many times... A levels is very hard... hav to PIA PIA AND PIA!!!!! she said she pia-ed like hell, and still din get gd results... she couldnt' get into NUS...

HAIZ! worried... but what can i do? studies, friendship, future.......

are there friends for life? i guess i should really change my character... try my best la!

smile smile smile!! think positive, be positive, stay positive huh, lyon? haha.. i din take pictures with other ppl... lazy.. and oso i dun tink i'm quite 熟 with many in class... xue ting said got class photos enuff liao... maybe lor.. but it's not 合照ma... it's different de lor!

i just realised it's been 1 week since i just blogged!! and i actually said that i improved and hav been writing posts every two days... oops so guilty! dunno what i have been busy about too..

publications? thinking abt subject combi? dunno lor... now let me recall what hav i done for the past week.

monday: there was a talk by public service commisions on their scholarship.. followed by a bio lecture for a bio workshop on PTC kit..

tuesday: got afternoon lesson.. went home after that to do survey for publications... as yr1s and 2s going off for holiday le!

wednesday: afternoon lessons till super late.. den went straight for karate le.. reached home super late! edited the survey in school and printed...

thursday: distributed survey.. the boys were collating the results.. while adeline and i were waiting for more replies.. haiz sadly 74 din reply! boo! after that ate lunch and went for training.. actualyl not training la, just toking with mdm nora... den the yr 3s were moving stuff into the new locker lor.. felt like i wasted money on taxi trip to karate... cos we toked to mdm nora for abt 1 hour only!!! wasted lotsa time! 15.70 lor! after karate, i was super super tired!!

friday: it was a holiday! went ms low's house... was supposed to meet rebecca, xue ting n lyon at 10.50am.. end up i woke up at 10.50am!!! hahaha... den end up reached ms low's house around 11.45am to 11.50am.. not that bad la... supposed to reach there by 11.30am de! ms low's cooking is nubbad lor! the chicken wings, spaghetti, mushrooms were super nice! the ice lemon tea was quite nice too! den later played bridge with the others... den later we were deciding to go kbox or movie... so later decided to go watch lust caution with yifan, siu ling, jolene, meiyun, jinghuan, and guppy... haha i'm so PUZZLED by the lust caution... i really dun understand the movie lor!!! as in i noe what is happening, but i have a feeling, there should be a deeper meaning.. haha but dun tink i can comprehend it now at my stage! but the movie is nubbad la... haha i-weekly said that, they shouldn't cut it just to make it NC-16 because the reviewer feels that 16 yr olds "xiao3 gua1" won't understand it either.. i agree with it! cos i dun understand! boo! den later went home le... had a long long long long talk with my mum regarding to subject combi..

saturday: today? or yesterday? haha talked again with my mum regarding to subject combi.. den later went for piano.. after that went to find cynthia's present.. haiz.. shouldn't have asked lor.. now i noe she wans a jewellery box, it's even more hard to find! cos not many shops are selling jewellery box.. den somemore she has a unique taste! haha.. wasted quite a lot of time.. went to lucky plaza to find a cheap one.. 3 for 10 dollars.. my mum saw my maid's and decided to ask me to go check it out.. end up the goods quite poor quality la, so i din buy.. the place was quite.. urm... ya u noe it la.. den after that i told my mum to find for me, which other branches cards n such have except bukit batok and yishun cos i just came from there! den my mum told me got paragon, plaza sing n centre point.. before that i was walking around... walked to wisma, den to takashimaya to buy a pretzel.. nubad! den later went to paragon.. end up the shop moved! haiz wasted my time.. den later walked to centre point... phew got cards n such! haha went to kalms beforehand.. saw 1 more design of the jewellery box from the branches in yishun n west mall.. it's a hemisphere gold jewellery box...much bigger than the small gold one which i saw at west mall.. but it's 28.90! haiz duno which to buy! maybe should get xueting n lyon to see for me! still got some time left... scholars flying on 5nov! my mum told me to work hard for o lvl higher chinese, she said i shouldn't be going everywhere now... so hmph.. must zhu4 yi4 le! she said definitely got things to study.. so i shall listen!!!!! ok continue... after looking thru i realized i only had 19 dollars! shouldn't have bought the coffee bean drink that costed 5.80! lol but later still took mrt home lor.. and reached home with a super sore feet.. talked again with my mum regarding subject combi... haha it's been a bother for me! but i have made my choice le! actually i dun tink i can get this subject combi.. but nevertheless i should try right!

Maths, Biology, Chemistry, CLL.. i'm going to take CLEP... den later take H3 CLL.. hopefully my results will be ok? since i slacked for so long le... :( hope that the school can give me another chance >.< more than half of the class is taking this combi! since no one wans to take physics... haiz i failed physics so i cant take it anymore... besides i hope i can squeeze into medicine or pharmacy.. need chem and bio... if not physics for medicine.. i tink pharmacy probably got more chance of getting in.. but if i cant take bio den DIE LE!!!!! haiz... regret lor... now i really understood what my mum told me after i took my PSLE results.. she said 你成绩好，你选人。你成绩不好，别人选你。i really understand that now... my PSLE results was good enuff for me to make decisions.. now my results.. i can only pray hard that i can get what i want... :( all those good in physics oso dun wan to take physics! all wanna take bio and chem! how to get the combi i wan!!! i guess i may hav to appeal to take physics le.. if i really got eliminated from bio chem... anyway my grades are not good too.. when ppl can get both A+, i only got an A and a B... how to 跟别人抢！i only have myself to blame lor... but i'm satisfied with my results le... i'm grateful to the school for moderating a lot of subjects... if not my chem would have been a C! den my gpa only 3.06... but lucky.. i have 3.33 now le! at least i can get 4H2.. and apply for CLEP... now i can only pray hard that i can get the LEP scholarship... den i will have hope for my future!!!

my mum told me that i have to be very determined and work doubly hard... tink i dun hav problem with being determined.. but somehow i still feel 力不从心, having slacked for so long... but i have ambitious ambitions... i have to work doubly doubly doubly hard to achieve that! HOPE HOPE HOPE!!! this means that i can never go kbox, movies, watch kelly's videos on youtube, follow up on kelly's news everytime, go shopping walk around often anymore!!! have to study study study hard!!! it's easy to say but hard to do! but hopefully i can do that laaaaaaa...

tt time when i went to taiwan, the fengshui master said that i have 主妇命,meaning that i'll be a housewife for all my life with not much achievements!!! when i heard that i cried! cos i dun wan to be a housewife!!!!! i want to do something great... i want to contribute to the society! i have been praying that the person counted wrongly...cos apparently the person is quite unprofessional la... as compared to his teacher... :P hopefully he counted wrongly!!!!!!!!! cos i DUN WAN to buy a housewifeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee... i noe i have 死脑筋la.. but i still dun wan to be a housewifeee!!! pray hard work hard... there is no fateee! ppl determine their own lives! haha LA exam...

ok this is a super long entry... 1 week din blog le! actually have been really busy with karate nowadays... it's like after wed n thursday i feel that i have lost touch with the whole world.. dunno leh go home super late... 10.25pm leh.. den go home straightaway sleep le! but we're learning katas le! that means patterns la, instead of just basics! we're fast! haha den the instructor was like saying we must go for the next grading le.. yay den i can upgrade liao! 1 step nearer to a black belt!

ok have to sleep liao! tomorrow having last chinese tuition of my life!!! den wednesday is the o level le!!! after tuition still have to go pray in the temple to confirm my choice... hopefully everything will go smoothly... good night!

listening to: 印象派的爱情，by 潘嘉丽. currently my favourite song! super super nice! :D

Woo i'm back again! After looking thru on and off the proposal for publications and finish watching cai hua heng yi chu xin xiu...

OOPS i tink i'm getting crazy over xiao jing teng!!!!!!! haha i'm so outdated!!! but he really rocks!!!!!! he sings really really well! love this kind of powerful voice! haha just like yang pei an..

if u havent take a look... u must see here... REALLY NICE REALLY NICE... at first quite uncomfortable listening to it, cos abit 撮撮逼人。but it's REALY REALLY NICE!!!!!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z1s4zoeAMyE

this is the picture which i said i'll post some entries before... haha acting cute! but the art work at esplanade there are really quite creative and well-done lor!

I'm back to blogging le! Yay putting my blogaddress on msn nick does help huh.. at least more ppl are tagging le! my blog is getting alive!!



anyway just looked at some other ppl's blog, i realized my entries are really damn long.. haha and they are all very lor1 sor1.. they sound childish oso! boo when can i ever learn to write professionally?

i wan to join MSC!!!!!!!! but air weapons has to be my first CCA... den dunno still can join MSC as 2nd cca or not.. .haiz! i still hav publications! den hav to write the proposal... haiz great opportunity to brush up on my english huh... just realized my english is HORRIBLE! more horrible than i tot it to be... but my mum dun wan me to go british council for tuition leh... or i should just go for a GP tuition? haiz.

and i'm so glad kelly is doing very well now! hope that she will surpass Weilian! :) have been watching her videos for the whole afternoon... must support her!! i actually missed her autograph session!!!!!! it was on the 20th october, i totally forgot about it!!! BOOOOO... i only recalled today when i was reading her news... BOOOO!!! don't tink she's coming back soon, as she would need to go back to taiwan, den to china, den to hongkong! haiz nvm la must be happy for her now that she's going regional le!!! SUPERSTAR!

Finally done with Japanese o level! haha i'm quite sure i'll get a F9.. The reading comprehension was quite easy actually, but all the kanjis i dunno! cos i din bother to study haahaha... the listening comprehension was super difficult, and i'm not the only one that says that.. There's an open-ended section, which was super horribly difficult.. the person was speaking so quickly, that i could catch nothing! den i just anyhow write lor, haha definitely wrong de. 7 marks gone liao out of 22! BOO HOO... aiya hu cares la... it wun affect me in promoting rite? so i should just forget about this..

And I'm glad that out of the 9 ppl that we invited to join, only 1 is left for more persuading... the others accepted le! haha i managed to ask lyon to join us as cameo cca haha since like csc and dance shouldn't be too straining?

shall talk abt yesterday ba... yesterday had a meeting for publications, den reached home at 5 plus which was super late... den i realized that i need to air my karate uniform cos they are super smelly frm my sweat the day before yesterday.. den do here do there, den i committed a very serious mistake.. i on the internet explorer window.. den u can predict what happened, i left home late.. luckily i need not wait for too long for 112... den right after lesson ended, adeline called me.. saying that the proposal got problem and the teacher ms jennifer wu is talking to her on msn regarding this.. so my whole journey home was on the handphone with adeline.. OOPS.. even when i was shaking here and there on the stupid 147 bus that took super long to come.. and no seats somemore! den when i reach home, i cannt bathe lor... imagine i have sweated so much.. but i dun blame adeline la.. cos if i still went to bathe, sure cannot finish in time... so we discussed again.. den she re-did the 30-week plan and i re-did the objectives all that.. we did till 1 plus am lor... den i was super super super pissed.. i dunno why i'm the one doing all the work again.. but adeline like dun mind leh... am i really that petty? cos i dun wan to be like what i have predicted: i'll end up doing most of the work while others shake leg!

and oso i was printing 2 copies of the proposal which was 10 pages long.. end up i used 20 pieces of paper... den suddenly i recalled i had jap exam and won't be going to sch! so i told my mum that i would pass this to adeline in the morning at the subsidised bus stop before going for 3rd lang.. end up on the next morning, my mother shouted at me asking me to call adeline if she can meet my parents or not... den it's like i was talking to adeline on the phone with a toad's voice.. wah in a super bad mood la, first thing in the morning get scolded twice by mother... den later my mum left home in a rush that she even forgot to take my proposal!!!! lucky my dad was still around wearing his shoes, so i asked him to help me take lor.. den suddenly my mum banged on the door and scolded me for not giving her the proposal... -.-

den later come back, discuss the proposal again with mdm arfah... again, i realized many unconfirmed things.. den suddenly got very irritated! i lost my temper again at Chee Guan... dunno la, super annoying... it's like not enuff sleep, and dunno why i'm doing all these.. and what made me most mad is, after the first discussion, he dun wan to bring the paper for first discussion to sch again for me for reference. the paper contained what kenneth wrote for our aims and objectives... it's in pro language, and i definitely cannot do that... so when i was doing the proposal for the first time, i was super super super angry. cos i told him to sms me what kenneth wrote and he din do that. so i just had to write in what i can remember la.. end up today mdm arfah said the language got problem.. den i was very very very very very very angry. GRRRRRR it's not the first time liao lor... always 口说不做。dunno how this cca can survive... GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!

im losing confidence in this whole thing la.. den yesterday got quite troubled by the cca option form thing.. cos i wan to join maths and science council! it may help in my testimonial and i would like to take on research programmes... den now i'm tied down by this stupid thing... got very irritated again. i even wanted to quit air weapons lor... haiya! i still feel that i seem to be losing something if i dun try out other new ccas.. apparently very few ppl are staying in their junior high CCA as a core cca maybe except band. hopefully MSC can be taken as 2nd CCA!

and now another troubling question... subject combi.. i hope to have a 4H2 combi leh.. but i dun hav gpa 3.2! 3.06... gRRR i just need 1 C grade to be pulled up to a B grade den i can hit 3.2 le!!!!! hopefully LA or Chem can be moderated!!!!!!! den basically i tink i'll be going for science stream la... ya i noe i have to choose according to interest.. actually to tell the truth, I AM interested in science facts.. but dunno why i cant do well.. maybe my brain dun work fast enuff or i'm lazy to work hard lors.. cos science subjects require a lot of hard work and brain work. I know my abilities are oso not in science, but i do feel that i din work hard enuff.. My mum told me i shouldn't 逃避from sciences just because i cant do well for it... there must be some reason and one would definitely be SLACK! so it will more or less be confirmed at Maths, Bio and Chem. But i'm still in a dilemna to choose my subjects for contrasive subjects. history, econs or Chinese Literature????? if u ask interest, i have interest in all 3. If u ask abilities? I would tell u, i dun really have much abilities in these subjects except that maybe i would be more confident in Chinese Literature. HOWEVER, history will be able to help me in GP! so i dunno what to choose. econs sound useful oso.. den it's a lot of analytical work... quite similar in how history works... HAIZ DUNNO WHAT TO DO!!!!!!!

have to make the choice on 30th le!!!!! worrying worrying worrying!!!!! aiya.. but for now i tink i need sleep... cos tmr have piano! and i havent practised.. last week is public holiday, tink the teacher would definitely expect me to practise.. but i din! oops! dunno wat i was doing... havent been doing homework and stuff.. i dunno what i'm doing leh... i'm not busy... maybe busy watching tv or going out? oso not really lor... friends always cannot go out with me.. although today i went kbox from 5pm-9pm.. quite expensive lor... but nubbad la, sang quite a lot of songs.. den sang a lot of duets too! finally i can sing as a female voice!!! haha but it's only with "fake voice" cos my real voice is low.. den my "fake voice" sounds very childish.. den the chee guan said that im only suitable to sing cute cute songs which is so yucky. they said my singing is ordinary lor... so hurt!!!!! i wan to improve in singing!!!!! i always cannot find my correct key.. i can sing sing sing den suddenly jump a key! dunno why i have this problem leh... i tend to follow the original singer's key.. den it's most of the time either too high or too low... or i end up using "fake voice" all the way... haiz. only like liang jing ru's songs is sang most comfortably... but sometimes i use "fake voice" at the inappropriate parts... i can only find my key if i sing together with another person who oso have a quite low voice like Rebecca! OMG... haiz..... must learn to find key... but maybe it's because i have a large range! hahaha... as in... even though i'm using "fake voice" it's not really "fake" cos i still can go even higher which is then the "fake voice".. but normally when i talk everyone noes my voice is very low.. but when i start singing, the key will jump a few keys! also dunno why lor... i can sing sing sing with this key until i have to use "fake voice" which i'm not good at utilising... have to control all that... haiz hope that i can start learning singing soon to learn how to use my diaphragm to sing properly and to find my proper key and not change in all the time!!!! if not liddat how to sing well rite! :)

Tomorrow's the o level jap! and can you believe it... up to just now 10pm, i still dunno the syllabus, have to ask mei xue... so MALU!!! boohoo but nvm meixue is a nice girl..den after asking i realized i can see the o level ten year series la!!!! stupid rite!!!

today was a slack day. we had subject combi talk, cca talk, exhibition, blah blah... saw thru all the subject combi le, still in a dilemna! but at least i more or less know what i have to choose la... now have to choose between history or CLL as contrasive subject lor.. den cca.. there are really a wide array of ccas to choose from!!!! dunno what to choose! wanted ISAC de lor... but.. it has to be my core cca, so no choice lar! den i just realized that every category can only have 1 cca chosen!!! cannot 2nd cca be from the same category too! DIE LE!!! i wan youth flying club! how!!!

but anyway... kenneth, chee guan and i were supposed to go kbox.. end up the person said we could only sing till 5pm.. so chee guan said that it was bu zhi de.. and jurong actually had a lot of ppl, had to wait for rooms lor! so we went pizza hut for lunch.. den i realized kenneth is very greedy.. our meal din hav salad, but he went to take them!!! shhh hahaha.. but it's true lor.. nobody cares... tink i should have taken more servings of soup la! LOL.. den we started to talk about our coach for next year.. we cant make a decision! actually i'm ok with anything ba, more or less neutral.. i'm ok with safra and cdans too.. even though i hope that i can have a china coach, but i oso do hope that the coach will be caring too.. haiz super mao dun! we spent lotsa time talking abt that...

den later we decided to go back to kbox again!!! haha no rooms again.. the person said we had to wait till 5pm.. so we decided not to wait.. guess where we went next.. MACDONALDS! for ice-cream.. i tink going out with them, i'll gain LOTSA LOTSA LOTSA weight la!!!! den suddenly we got so excited again about the cca publications.. actually to be specific, kenneth wasn't la.. he was very shocked at our enthusiasm! cos we wanted to have this cca quite some time ago.. den we saw that it was in the list of merit ccas! haha den we were thinking of our proposal... den we oso wrote down a list of ppl who might be interested...

IT'S SUPER FUN! I'M LOOKING FORWARD TO THAT!!!!! haha.. even though there may not be many competitions which we can take part in, but i believe it'll definitely look good in the testimonial de! besides my core cca is still air weapons mah, should be able to get more points frm there ba! i realized ah.. chee guan definitely has much more enthusiasm than me.. he called me telling me to find out the ppl interested and to discuss more.. unfortunately he called me on hp! den it was super uncomfortable talking on hp, so i din have the mood to talk... we'll discuss tmr!!!! however, from the list that he told me that would be interested, there is someone which i'm not really on good terms with.. haiz.. anyway there are really really few ppl whom i'm on good terms with, so i shall try not to mind..

YAY!!!!! I tink there's a high chance that this cca can be set up.. cos of its feasibility! it was supposed to be set up, dunno what happened la... so we must try to start this project again! mdm ilyana said that we can have this cca.. if we have less than 20 ppl, we can talk to her.. which means 有得商量! yippeeeee!!! high chance of getting this cca set up lor!

anyway.. i just read a horoscope thing frm somewhere... it says that i'm actually good at scientific laws and theories leh... so does that mean i'm a science person?? haha..no wonder i'm not good at writing! LOL.. dunno got basis or not la.. but anyway i have decided to go into science le.. at least it would give me more career options even though my passion is still chinese.. but apparently chinese literature isn't quite alike to the chinese we study now.. so i should consider twice whether i should take up CLEP or not.. cos have to take either H2 CLL AND H3 CLL or H2 CLL and H1 CSC which i would definitely not want.. confirm wun take CSC le... don't think i wan to study about china all the time.. I WILL DIE. at least chinese literature is still quite interesting.. so if i can do well in science, i'll prolly aim for pharmacy or medicine if i can even cope! or if i still wan to be a chinese reporter for zao bao.. i believe publications should be able to help me.. anyway for university, don't need to have chinese literature in order to enter the chinese faculty, so should be no prob ba! so maybe... tentatively.. my combi will be.......

Maths, Chem, Bio, History.. i feel like taking all H2 levels.. but i dun hav 3.2 gpa! will they allow appealing or not arh... cos i dun feel like taking history at H1... cos i quite like history de lor... or if i can only take 3H2 and 1 H1, den i cannot take CLL le! cos CLL only offered in H2... haiz hope they will have moderation or something or allow me to appeal.. my gpa should be 3.06 ba.. at least i pulled up to a 3!!! work harder work harder!!! i really regret slacking my time away.. but i'm oso relieved that i managed to keep myself from someone at an arm's length... this person is in deep trouble liao.. failed a lot of subjects, tink this person won't even have a contrasive subject!!! dunno how this person is going to do le.. some ask me, aren't u worried for this person.. it's actually not whether i'm worried for this person or not... it's like, no use worrying for this person right? cos this person doesn't even care! from what i heard this person din even bother to study for eoys! how can expect to pass? at least i din really work hard for eoys rite, but i still listen in class.. this person din even listen in class, eoys din study, how to pass? at the very least i passed all subjects, except physics.. cos i din even care abt it.. i actually wanted to take physics de lor.. but haiz... i failed it, so cant take it le! :( so take chem and bio lor! good la, at least help me to eliminate a subject le! i have a feeling that i may develop passion for life sciences... or at the very least, i do have interest for sciences, but no passion yet la... cos all my passion were used up for chinese... hope i will be determined enough la!

heard today that the statistics for 4As in other JCs is quite high... which means i cant depend on results oso... cos i dun tink i can even get 4As either... so have to count on CCAs, CIP,and my interview skills le.. i flopped 1 interview, i shan't let history repeat itself! have an urge to join maths and sciences council cos it would definitely help in my testimonial... but won't actually a real research programme with external programmes help more? actually i would prefer youth flying club... cos i still believe that... since i'm born with good eyesight.. it's inherited... i believe that fate would like me to do something which requires good eyesight... flying is one i believe... dunno which are other choices... and oso since the horoscope thing says that i should be good in scientific law, maybe i should give up on the choice of being a lawyer! hahaha... just a crazy idea cos the pay is really good! but think maybe my language isn't that strong... i struggle quite a lot of history.. and chinese is i really have to work very very hard in order to achieve such results... haiz super tiring... dun hav talent for it means dun hav la.. just have to accept it lor.. and i can't possibly fight a case in chinese either... if i speak english, i get tongue-tied..how am i going to be a lawyer??? hahaha... maybe a doctor? or a pharmacist? or a pilot? but very few female pilots rite... but i always liked to try male-dominated stuff wat... if not i wouldn't have joined air weapons, i wouldn't have gone for karate... all male-dominated lor.. karate can the whole class have 20 plus ppl and only 3 females, not including me and Rebecca...haha isn't that male-dominated? must try new stuff ma! if not i would have joined chinese society or chinese orchestra le... capricorn are very conventional.. but don't think i'm conventional thinking from that point of view..

anyway.. friday have jap listening compre and reading compre... it should be easier to take la? but have to memorise kanji! but for tomorrow is compo! den i saw the format for the other paper... like nothing to prepare de lor... compo... tell me what i can prepare la! so this means that... TOMORROW DIE LIAO!!!!!!! i'm not sad at all leh.. haha dun feel anything at all.. haiz in holiday mood le la.. no exams!!! but have to do chem ws and chinese ws, oops! sorry father, wasted your money! :)

Shall blog a little before studying for Japanese! The exam's on wednesday... and i'm not a bit nervous.. think probably cynthia is studying even harder than me.. cos all the guidebooks and the examination itself costs money... but i'm not in the bit affected leh! oh dear!!! >.<

talk about today.. i went kbox today.. end up when we re-checked in for k student package, they said that we can only sing till 4.30pm! den i was so bushuang.. xueting kept telling me to complain... so we push the responsiblity to and fro.. and later i decided to go find out while she accompanied me.. so at first i was the one who asked and clarified, until xue ting opened her mouth and said "but your poster said 2-7pm wat. then isn't that cheating people!" haha den the person was so worried that she went to call, her supervisor probably? den the person decided to let us sing till 6pm..

then..... we were singing 其实很爱你by 张韶涵 until a blackout occurred!!!!!! funny rite... we were at the chorus part lor... den suddenly everything went dark... a lot of people screamed!!!!! den the kbox staff went to every room to announce that they are having a blackout and asked us not to be alarmed... actually before they come, we were continuing the last part of the song without the music lor... haha when the staff went away, we were like saying, we weren't in the bit alarmed!!! lol.. crazy over singing le la..

den, i was trying to persuade lyon to join air weapons! haha den xue ting chipped in too.. den we sang 西界by lin jun jie with music from lyon's mp3.. den it was back to persuading! den lyon suddenly said that wow it's 5pm already! the blackout occurred at around 4 plus liddat.. den i was so shocked that i had been persuading lyon to join air weapons for almost 1 hour! i was persuading her to join for around 1 plus hour thru msn yesterday.. haha i'm super despo la.. but she kept saying that she'll consider... >.< haizz disappointed!

but later the staff came again and said that the repairing may take some time... so their supervisor signed something so that next time we go we can have 2 hours extended! den i was saying that everytime there's something, it has to be at toa payoh! lol.. maybe cos we go there often ba?

tomorrow giving out the letters of invitation le... and i'm told that thursday will be the deadline for cca option... super worried! will we have all top 3 choices or not... >.< i'm not so worried for boys team, cos at least there's a team.. but for girls... there's only me!!!!!!! super worrying laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa... if any interested parties, pls don't hesitate to apply for us.. we'll accept de.. cos YAY! we don't need to have a fixed intake anymore!!!! YAY YAY YAY!!!!! for those who arent' really keen, like jolene... hmph just to tell u.. i'm told that the attendance for ccas will be flexible.. don't mind if you put air weapons as your 2nd cca.. even our training sessions clashes with your cca, you can go for ur 1st cca.. but intensive training during holidays you have to come la... not too overboard ba! cos nationals is very impt de! we really need you!!! you have the potential! so why not use it to help the sch to gain more achievements! we're a new set-up team, we need to have a good headstart! so please consider la!!!! 2nd cca oso nvm de!

Back to blog again!!!!

Still on the next year intake issue... haiz it's really worrying lor... i actually couldn't get to sleep last night because of that... hope our 1st 2 choices will consider joining, cos their standard is far better than the others >.< but of course interest matters too...

i have to study japanese!!!!!!! but cant bring myself to it... i'm having jap exam on wednesday... but tomorrow i'm going kbox from 11-7pm!!! hahaaha cos kbox has 5th year anniversary!!! all the packages at 5 dollars!!!! YAY!!! Lol...

Hope that the o levels will end too, so that i can really really relax... starting to have lotsa white hair le... :(

my 61st post! lalala...

I'm super sleepy... after karate... pulled a muscle somemore... feel like dying!!! haha but karate is still fun! love it man! tmr is the shooting workshop!!! hope that everything will go well...


now let me talk abt my exam results... the few subjects that shocked me was Biology and Language Arts... I din expect myself to fail the LA compre, but since everyone oso just passed, it's ok la... but my essay! the stupid vase gave me 14/25!!!!! for both essays! I HATE HER LOR!!!!!!! end up my LA just passed only... and ms yee din specially mention that my documentary is good... very worried that my film got very low marks! den i sure die le!!!!!! i really need LA to be pulled up an A, if not i really die le... cos i died for chem exam!!!!!!! i couldn't get a B... :'( can only settle with a C.. but luckily maths is two subjects... so i hav C for maths 1 and B for maths 2... if my LA can get an A, den i'll hit 3.2... pray hard pray hard...

now talk abt biology... i was really shocked that i can at least get 66, even though it's super lan already... u can see my previous entries... i really really really, really, i swear that i din study... i only studied properly till nutrition... end up nothing came out, which made me really mad... tot i would hav failed when i heard that there are 2 failures... but luckily it's not me! PHEW! quite shocked abt my results, cos i actually din study... and it's biology somemore, a memorising subject... it's a good thing that i still have my A... :) at least not that pathetic...

Physics was well... HAHAHA... i din expect to pass anyway, i din even study the main chapter magnetism... i dun expect to pass... LOL... but it's shocking that i actually got higher marks than last year! at least i din get a F... i got a D! lol but who cares... i'm not gonna count physics in anyway..

Chem was disappointing... but i knew i deserved this kinda result... imagine slacking the whole two years, den when tomorrow is the exam, i'm still slacking... den midnight den start to rummage through the notes... i dun expect to get high marks... true enuff.. but at least i din fail! so i should be thankful le... blame myself for not studyign lor... dunno why i gave up studying too... too lazy ba?

History was ok la... but quite disappointing, after comparing with other ppl... tot i would hav done better de... maybe it just shows that i'm really not humanities inclined... i cannot write as well as others... :( xue ting is very/quite science-inclined and she got higher than me... so this just tells me that i shouldn't go for humanities!!! somemore i failed my LA!!!!! last time i can get higher marks than xue ting de, and this time she got much much higher than me... so worrying!!!! i can forget about humanities le... i dun wanna die!!! and the stupid weifu... he's super er xin... he got 92 for history!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! he actually got full marks for the two essays u noe!!!!! so SUPER BIAN TAI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! haiz this kinda person is die die humanities inclined lor... BUT... his maths and sciences all very gd lor...except biology and physics... he gave up physics... but dunno what happened to his bio... he actually got lower marks than all of us!

chinese was... quite disappointing... but at least i still have an A... so i shall not complain... cos i tink that i should get higher marks for my zuo wen :(

maths was... ms low said i improved a lot frm last year... but i rmb last year i got about the same score!!!! quite disappointed too... but at least i still hav a B! i must work harder next year... i'm starting to feel that i'm getting the hang of it la... it's too late rite... but i must work hard!!!!!!!

overall... i only hope that LA will hav moderation... cos i'm not far away from A... i got 68.0 something!!!!! 2 more marks!!!!!!!! pray hard that there will be moderation... den can i get a 3.2... which is a minimum gpa... i aim for 4H2... hopefully i can make it!!!! i really wan to start afresh... hope i'll get a chance!!!!!!!

actually i sort of decided that i'll go for humanities... however after looking at my LA results, my chinese results and my history results, i do realize that i really cannot write well... even in chinese... cos my zuowen din score well!! my chinese only got 73... which is relatively low... even though history got a 74... but as compared to others, it's low!!!!! if i go for humanities, dun tink i can survive with the competition... cos i dun really like writing... even though xue ting and rebecca jus suggested me to go for humanities so that i'll be a reporter... but it's reporter for gossips... so it's smth like paparazzi!!!! lol but i dun really like to write leh... i dunno what i wan!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i just know that... everytime i watch 天涯侠医, i hav a very strong urge to be a doctor... i know very well that with my lousy results i cant... but i really would like to help people!!! with my knowledge... but i'm not a very sociable person... so i really dunno how la!!!!!

i used to think that i'm stronger in languages... but it seems like, no i'm not! look at how i write this blog and u'll know... i look at other's blog... they can hav poems, and they are all so shi qing hua yi... but for me? i really canot do this kinda thing, no matter how hard i try... and i really dun like to write essays...

maybe i should really choose sciences... chem bio or chem physics? and should i go LEP? i know chinese has always been my strongest subject, but I struggled a lot... i put in a lot of effort in chinese and yet my result is still a very very very little above average... or average... it may not be my strengths...

it's unbelievable... but i do think that there's a certain percentage that my strengths is actually sciences!!!!!!! even though i had always flopped my maths and sciences in primary sch and in lower sec... actually lower sec i did quite ok for maths and sciences la, average or a little below average... the reason that i can do well is it because i dun put in enuff effort? i wun bring myself to understand more and tink more... maybe cos i dun like to use my brain... HAIZZZZZ... what should I choose? i have to make my choice at the end of this month... i feel like i'm holding on to a time bomb... and the date is nearing... WHAT SHOULD I DO???? >.<

maybe i should really choose sciences.. to keep my options open... cos for science faculties, there are subject pre-requisites... but for humanities faculties, there are no pre-requisites... maybe GP only... so i should go for sciences rite? in case i wan to go into engineering or pharmaceuticals... or if possible... medicine..

is it because i have not been working hard, that's why i keep flopping my maths and sciences? but if i have to work hard to get gd results, then it shouldn't be my abilities! for some, maths and sciences just comes natually to them, but for me it's not... quite artificial in fact... it's hard for me to absorb all the science facts oso... and also to analyse... but undeniably... i AM interested to know more about science facts... but prob is the fact that i always cannot do well in exams just put me off.. but i oso shouldn't run away frm it because of that rite...

HAIZ i must make my choice clearly la! but whatever it is... i have to work hard!!!!! start reading newspaper, newsweek, times... haiz... going to use up a lot of money liao !

and next week got jap o level...and i havent study yet... i'm prepared to fail le ba???? OMG... better start soon... tomorrow? den 14th to 18th k box got 5th anniversary... 5 dollars only!!! i wanted to go everyday de lor... until xue ting reminded me that i still have my o levels... haha but heck care le la... if jap affects my higher chinese cert den i'll take higher chinese again!!!! hopefully i wun get a F9!

anyway i'm really sleepy... tomorrow hav to oversee the workshop too... gd nite! :)

i have been blogging a lot! haha 60 posts le! lol...

今天和雪婷林露去了esplanade, 墙壁上都是那些艺术家的杰作，好羡慕！看起来真得很美。我和雪婷有一起拍了一张照片，不过在林露那里，改次再放上来。。在通往mrt的隧道空无一人，看照片就知道了。有一种阴森森的感觉！不过也许是我多疑吧，他们两人都没觉得什么。还记得有一天，回家的时候，家里没有人，我就把所有的灯打开，结果哥哥回来的时候就把一些没有在用的灯关起来，然后问我“你看到了什么”。哈哈那时真想笑，如果看到了什么，早就跑路了啦！

刚刚原本写好了文章准备发了，结果发生了一些事，全都没了。我懒得再写一遍，反正多是在说今天发生的事，和选科的烦恼啦。

明天要和心媚刘佳林露雪婷去唱歌，好期待！我超爱唱歌！不过，嗨我还有日语考试得准备，听说那个人有在准备，真是贱人一个！讨厌死她了。害人家不努力，自己就乘机。过分！不过当然我最应该怪自己笨，上了别人的当！我后悔了，真的后悔了。真的不能交上损友，后果不堪设想！现在已是后悔莫及了。。。:'(

上星期六和天和妈妈到bugis the hotel inter-continental 住。很无聊吧，又不是旅客。哈哈不过不必付钱，因为妈妈是他们的会员。设备非常好！应该是五星以上吧！买了几份生日礼物，但还是不齐全！又另一个烦恼！我的白头发真的越长越多，烦！

我讨厌被人拒绝的感觉！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！


为什么没有人对射击有兴趣？？？？？？ 当每个人当着面对我说他们一点兴趣也没有，心真的碎了。因为花了好多时间讨论，安排。。 结果却是如此令人失望。是我人缘不好吗？希望别班的反应会比较好一些吧！　


























好了。。别想伤心的事了。接下来有好多好多照片！哈哈我不常这么做，不过看人家把照片放在博克里，好像很好玩似的！Drug design workshop experiment where we were decomposing an aspirin tablet...

去了药厂，大家都很帅吧！

我的另一个发型，有刘海比较好看，还是没有好看呢？

我们得套shoe-covers 才能走入这间房间呢！麻烦死了！

认得谁是谁吗？

我发现以上三张照片都有一个共同点，就是我的手势都很奇怪！第一张，明明是在写东西，可是不知道左手为什么无缘无故翘起来！第二张右手不知道为什么会紧握着？第三张，手看起来就是很不自然．．．


好了，先去看校花校草追赶跑，再回来继续，还有还得做elective 的功课！

YEAH! removed the navbar le... hahaha within how many minutes? whee... it's useful to check out the internet for instructions cos there will definitely be computer pros out there... :)

just changed my blogskin! haha finally! for 2 plus years le... the top is blocked by the stupid navbar!!! if anyone knows how to settle this problem, can pls tell me? u can tag at the tagboard! any comments are welcomed too!

These few weeks have been having drug design workshop as my elective! It's nubbad la, but apparently the lecturer is very very very boring!!!! And it's been a long time since I felt that I'm 发呆-ing when it appears that i'm very attentive! hasn't been paying much attention to the lecturer except for the 2nd day. The first day i fell asleep at the 2nd part, and 3rd and 4th day i was stoning. Today's the fifth day, we went to Beacons pharmaceutical! The visit's short la, and actually not very enriching... but it was an eye-opener! All the high tech machines, and all of us had to wear hair cover, shoe covers and a mask! haha everyone looks funny... And i was so glad that my mask din drop off because of the fact that i dun hav 鼻梁。hahaha... but i have to say, the practicals are very very nice!!! Can visit dinah's blog at everlasting-yourlight.blogspot.com to see the photos... im too lazy to take photos... >.< there was this practical, when we were decomposing an aspirin pill, then there was acidic fumes released which made everyone cough! dinah and I were the very first to smell it lor... we were like "what is that smell? what is that smell?" den starts to cough cough cough!! den everyone starts to cough... den everyone runs out, leaving me still standing on the same spot looking blur... lol.. luckily it's not poisonous! and apparently this spread to everyone else, when i said i'm from drug design, the others will say "oh, i heard that there was this experiment which caused everyone to get choked and run out of the lab" and the effect was really great, till the lab techs at the next lab got choked too! Thru this elective, i oso got to know dinah better! Still nubbad la... left 2 days only, must try to pay attention! and not forgetting to do my best for the presentation!

Next friday is the shooting workshop... and i'm super super worried because the response seems horrible... i only have jolene lai signing up!!! THANKS JOLENE LAI FOR YOUR SUPPORT!! but... it's really really sad! i have people telling me in the face that they dun wan to join, which makes my heart break into pieces.. i noe that this definitely wun appeal to many, but it still hurts me to see that after much efforts, most still dun appreciate... haiz what to do? hope that on 9 october when we collect the forms, there will be at least 20 people... or should i blame myself that i'm not sociable enuff? yongliang's class have ppl saying that they'll go as a form of support for him! Probably i'm too hateful le ba? That people dun hesitate to cross out the "interested" and hand it to me, as a form of "challenge". Dunno la, i like to think too much, please ignore me.

I wanted to go singing!!!! Then super super sianzzzzz... haiz have to wait till next week le cos no one can accompany me.. shall try to bug my mother to go with me tmr... haha den i dun nid to pay myself! i tink i'm getting addicted to singing le, especially after the last singing session with liu jia and rebecca... cos i really sang a lot... and it was only towards the end, that i finally got warmed up and can hit the high notes... i was like 走音-ing at the front part, so sorry to the both of them for causing noise pollution! Now i FINALLY noe, i MUST only choose easy songs at the front, den choose more difficult songs like zhang hui mei's song at the back no matter how much i like them... LOL, i take so long to finally understand this fact...

And... I LOVE KARATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! But I'm afraid that i will be like what rebecca is afraid too, we'll give up because of A-levels... hope that i wun... even if i would, it will only be temporary... i wan to work till black belt, cos i dun wan to mop floor!!!!!! LOL and i wan to be like the girl, and lead the others... :)


Ok, now talk about my o-level jap... IT WAS A TOTAL DISASTER!!!!!!!! I know the others oso said that they died, but i tink no one should get lower marks than me, because i withdrew from 3rd lang already... dun understand why i'm still taking o-levels? to b honest, i oso dunno myself... i was too foolish, i should have been decisive enuff to withdraw from 3rd lang at the start of this year, and not take o-levels... i'm just wasting money and make my higher chinese cert look ugly... if my jap gets F9, and my chinese can get at least an A, i will tear up the cert and take higher chinese next year as private candidate! ok back to the exam... the reading passage thing, the very first word was a kanji, and i din noe how to read that!!!!! around 50% of the passage i cannot read because they were kanjis... and i just kept skipping them, skip skip skip, then i was mumbling thru, cos i din noe how to read them... den i realized i was monotonous... it was HORRIBLE... i tink i would do even better when i was in sec1!!!! BOOOOO... den the asking questions part was equally horrible... i actually said i would study when during holidays... WHAT A JOKe... LOL... den the teacher asked me what i like to study... den is said i like to study languages... but apparently i said the wrong vocab which left the teacher clueless as to what i was talking about... she thought for a while before helping to correct me! In an exam... -.-" den i even said i dislike jap!!!! haha i said at first i thought jap was interesting, but now as jap gets more difficult, i dislike jap! den the teacher was like "dislike" haha, she was VERY shocked... den i said i like to go singing with my friends... den the teacher was like saying so you go to karaoke lounge bar often... of course i cant go often right? but i forgot the other adverb, so i just said yes... and the teachers were like looking at each other with that kind of "gosh, this is a bad student" look... haiz misunderstanding mam! After i stepped out of the room, i realized i din say good afternoon to the examiners, nor say thank you... SLAP ME... and oso, this has to be recorded!!! And they are still using casettes tapes... and i din noe how to use a casette recorder! LOL... den the teacher was like telling me the instructions in japanese... i gave her a clueless look, den the other teacher told her to use english... LOL... my jap is HORRIBLE... dunno why it came to this lor... it was still fine, quite good in fact during sec 1 and sec 2... until i start to pon lessons with cynthia... >.<>.<

Haiz, it's a bad thing, that you update only very frequently like me... cos the posts will end up being very very long! hope this is the last thing... I PASSED MY PIANO EXAM! 102/150!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BY TWO MARKS! WOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! SUPER LUCKY! Lalalalalala... that time, i heard some sec 1/sec 2 junior playing on the sch piano, exactly the same pieces that i played... at that point i knew that i would definitely fail my exam... haha I'm super thrilled!!!!!!!! will be upgraded to grade 7 le! haha den i'll soon leave piano... for violin!!!! haha but see how ba... cant be too greedy, cos i cannot do piano well... maybe i'm not musically inclined ba... but piano really improved my rhythm... at least, i noe how to follow the music when singing... haha liu jia needs to jia you for rhythm cos she always sings too fast!!!! den i have to tell her "too fast too fast!" but her singing's quite ok la... at least better than somebody... :)

Suddenly have a very bad feeling... i knew very long time ago that school would end on 2 nov... tt time i was tinking that, wah lao so long then holidays... now i seem to dread the last day of school..

even though my relationships with classmates in 4B are not as strong as in 2B.. i still feel quite 依依不舍。i'm saying good bye to my secondary life already!!!!! life passes by so quickly... 好像让时间停止前进！转眼间我已经16岁了！再多几年，我就得踏入社会工作了。I'm dreading that........... Can I not grow up? 我不想我不想，不想长大！

I'm going to get separated with all my good friends le... xue ting, lyon, rebecca... just 3 really gd friends, but it's very sad lor... cos they are my really really really really gd friends! not forgetting the other classmates la.. liu jia, chen ying, mei xue, jochebed, jolene lai, siu ling, yifan, jasmine, daphne, huiwen, yao lu and so on la... not forgetting kailin too! i'll really miss crapping with u everyday morning during flag raising... calling each other 老猴子and 死狗... i'll miss crapping with jochebed too... miss talking with xue ting n lyon during class.. miss poking lyon.. miss bickering with xue ting... miss going out with them after we each hav a new group of friends...

haiz feel like crying now... i noe i'll definitely 疏远 them if we were to be in different classes... i noe we often say that "keep in touch ok!" but how often does that happen? haiz i can only say... it's really hard to find a really really gd friend that will stay with u for all ur life... i dun mind just having 1 very gd friend, rather than many friends that will just only wave and say hi to me...

i remember... she and i said before that we will go 北大 to study 中文系 together... we'll be hostel mates... now? believe me la, i'm really sad... but i hav to cut this friendship... or i'll fail my A levels in 2009.. even though i noe i may end up slacking again, but at least i cut away more than half of my chances of going out to play.. at least if i stay at home, it'll be better than i go out to play.. hopefully i'll be affected by others' piaing spirit..

my mum reminded me a many times... A levels is very hard... hav to PIA PIA AND PIA!!!!! she said she pia-ed like hell, and still din get gd results... she couldnt' get into NUS...

HAIZ! worried... but what can i do? studies, friendship, future.......

are there friends for life? i guess i should really change my character... try my best la!

smile smile smile!! think positive, be positive, stay positive huh, lyon? haha.. i din take pictures with other ppl... lazy.. and oso i dun tink i'm quite 熟 with many in class... xue ting said got class photos enuff liao... maybe lor.. but it's not 合照ma... it's different de lor!

i just realised it's been 1 week since i just blogged!! and i actually said that i improved and hav been writing posts every two days... oops so guilty! dunno what i have been busy about too..

publications? thinking abt subject combi? dunno lor... now let me recall what hav i done for the past week.

monday: there was a talk by public service commisions on their scholarship.. followed by a bio lecture for a bio workshop on PTC kit..

tuesday: got afternoon lesson.. went home after that to do survey for publications... as yr1s and 2s going off for holiday le!

wednesday: afternoon lessons till super late.. den went straight for karate le.. reached home super late! edited the survey in school and printed...

thursday: distributed survey.. the boys were collating the results.. while adeline and i were waiting for more replies.. haiz sadly 74 din reply! boo! after that ate lunch and went for training.. actualyl not training la, just toking with mdm nora... den the yr 3s were moving stuff into the new locker lor.. felt like i wasted money on taxi trip to karate... cos we toked to mdm nora for abt 1 hour only!!! wasted lotsa time! 15.70 lor! after karate, i was super super tired!!

friday: it was a holiday! went ms low's house... was supposed to meet rebecca, xue ting n lyon at 10.50am.. end up i woke up at 10.50am!!! hahaha... den end up reached ms low's house around 11.45am to 11.50am.. not that bad la... supposed to reach there by 11.30am de! ms low's cooking is nubbad lor! the chicken wings, spaghetti, mushrooms were super nice! the ice lemon tea was quite nice too! den later played bridge with the others... den later we were deciding to go kbox or movie... so later decided to go watch lust caution with yifan, siu ling, jolene, meiyun, jinghuan, and guppy... haha i'm so PUZZLED by the lust caution... i really dun understand the movie lor!!! as in i noe what is happening, but i have a feeling, there should be a deeper meaning.. haha but dun tink i can comprehend it now at my stage! but the movie is nubbad la... haha i-weekly said that, they shouldn't cut it just to make it NC-16 because the reviewer feels that 16 yr olds "xiao3 gua1" won't understand it either.. i agree with it! cos i dun understand! boo! den later went home le... had a long long long long talk with my mum regarding to subject combi..

saturday: today? or yesterday? haha talked again with my mum regarding to subject combi.. den later went for piano.. after that went to find cynthia's present.. haiz.. shouldn't have asked lor.. now i noe she wans a jewellery box, it's even more hard to find! cos not many shops are selling jewellery box.. den somemore she has a unique taste! haha.. wasted quite a lot of time.. went to lucky plaza to find a cheap one.. 3 for 10 dollars.. my mum saw my maid's and decided to ask me to go check it out.. end up the goods quite poor quality la, so i din buy.. the place was quite.. urm... ya u noe it la.. den after that i told my mum to find for me, which other branches cards n such have except bukit batok and yishun cos i just came from there! den my mum told me got paragon, plaza sing n centre point.. before that i was walking around... walked to wisma, den to takashimaya to buy a pretzel.. nubad! den later went to paragon.. end up the shop moved! haiz wasted my time.. den later walked to centre point... phew got cards n such! haha went to kalms beforehand.. saw 1 more design of the jewellery box from the branches in yishun n west mall.. it's a hemisphere gold jewellery box...much bigger than the small gold one which i saw at west mall.. but it's 28.90! haiz duno which to buy! maybe should get xueting n lyon to see for me! still got some time left... scholars flying on 5nov! my mum told me to work hard for o lvl higher chinese, she said i shouldn't be going everywhere now... so hmph.. must zhu4 yi4 le! she said definitely got things to study.. so i shall listen!!!!! ok continue... after looking thru i realized i only had 19 dollars! shouldn't have bought the coffee bean drink that costed 5.80! lol but later still took mrt home lor.. and reached home with a super sore feet.. talked again with my mum regarding subject combi... haha it's been a bother for me! but i have made my choice le! actually i dun tink i can get this subject combi.. but nevertheless i should try right!

Maths, Biology, Chemistry, CLL.. i'm going to take CLEP... den later take H3 CLL.. hopefully my results will be ok? since i slacked for so long le... :( hope that the school can give me another chance >.< more than half of the class is taking this combi! since no one wans to take physics... haiz i failed physics so i cant take it anymore... besides i hope i can squeeze into medicine or pharmacy.. need chem and bio... if not physics for medicine.. i tink pharmacy probably got more chance of getting in.. but if i cant take bio den DIE LE!!!!! haiz... regret lor... now i really understood what my mum told me after i took my PSLE results.. she said 你成绩好，你选人。你成绩不好，别人选你。i really understand that now... my PSLE results was good enuff for me to make decisions.. now my results.. i can only pray hard that i can get what i want... :( all those good in physics oso dun wan to take physics! all wanna take bio and chem! how to get the combi i wan!!! i guess i may hav to appeal to take physics le.. if i really got eliminated from bio chem... anyway my grades are not good too.. when ppl can get both A+, i only got an A and a B... how to 跟别人抢！i only have myself to blame lor... but i'm satisfied with my results le... i'm grateful to the school for moderating a lot of subjects... if not my chem would have been a C! den my gpa only 3.06... but lucky.. i have 3.33 now le! at least i can get 4H2.. and apply for CLEP... now i can only pray hard that i can get the LEP scholarship... den i will have hope for my future!!!

my mum told me that i have to be very determined and work doubly hard... tink i dun hav problem with being determined.. but somehow i still feel 力不从心, having slacked for so long... but i have ambitious ambitions... i have to work doubly doubly doubly hard to achieve that! HOPE HOPE HOPE!!! this means that i can never go kbox, movies, watch kelly's videos on youtube, follow up on kelly's news everytime, go shopping walk around often anymore!!! have to study study study hard!!! it's easy to say but hard to do! but hopefully i can do that laaaaaaa...

tt time when i went to taiwan, the fengshui master said that i have 主妇命,meaning that i'll be a housewife for all my life with not much achievements!!! when i heard that i cried! cos i dun wan to be a housewife!!!!! i want to do something great... i want to contribute to the society! i have been praying that the person counted wrongly...cos apparently the person is quite unprofessional la... as compared to his teacher... :P hopefully he counted wrongly!!!!!!!!! cos i DUN WAN to buy a housewifeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee... i noe i have 死脑筋la.. but i still dun wan to be a housewifeee!!! pray hard work hard... there is no fateee! ppl determine their own lives! haha LA exam...

ok this is a super long entry... 1 week din blog le! actually have been really busy with karate nowadays... it's like after wed n thursday i feel that i have lost touch with the whole world.. dunno leh go home super late... 10.25pm leh.. den go home straightaway sleep le! but we're learning katas le! that means patterns la, instead of just basics! we're fast! haha den the instructor was like saying we must go for the next grading le.. yay den i can upgrade liao! 1 step nearer to a black belt!

ok have to sleep liao! tomorrow having last chinese tuition of my life!!! den wednesday is the o level le!!! after tuition still have to go pray in the temple to confirm my choice... hopefully everything will go smoothly... good night!

listening to: 印象派的爱情，by 潘嘉丽. currently my favourite song! super super nice! :D

Woo i'm back again! After looking thru on and off the proposal for publications and finish watching cai hua heng yi chu xin xiu...

OOPS i tink i'm getting crazy over xiao jing teng!!!!!!! haha i'm so outdated!!! but he really rocks!!!!!! he sings really really well! love this kind of powerful voice! haha just like yang pei an..

if u havent take a look... u must see here... REALLY NICE REALLY NICE... at first quite uncomfortable listening to it, cos abit 撮撮逼人。but it's REALY REALLY NICE!!!!!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z1s4zoeAMyE

this is the picture which i said i'll post some entries before... haha acting cute! but the art work at esplanade there are really quite creative and well-done lor!

I'm back to blogging le! Yay putting my blogaddress on msn nick does help huh.. at least more ppl are tagging le! my blog is getting alive!!



anyway just looked at some other ppl's blog, i realized my entries are really damn long.. haha and they are all very lor1 sor1.. they sound childish oso! boo when can i ever learn to write professionally?

i wan to join MSC!!!!!!!! but air weapons has to be my first CCA... den dunno still can join MSC as 2nd cca or not.. .haiz! i still hav publications! den hav to write the proposal... haiz great opportunity to brush up on my english huh... just realized my english is HORRIBLE! more horrible than i tot it to be... but my mum dun wan me to go british council for tuition leh... or i should just go for a GP tuition? haiz.

and i'm so glad kelly is doing very well now! hope that she will surpass Weilian! :) have been watching her videos for the whole afternoon... must support her!! i actually missed her autograph session!!!!!! it was on the 20th october, i totally forgot about it!!! BOOOOO... i only recalled today when i was reading her news... BOOOO!!! don't tink she's coming back soon, as she would need to go back to taiwan, den to china, den to hongkong! haiz nvm la must be happy for her now that she's going regional le!!! SUPERSTAR!

Finally done with Japanese o level! haha i'm quite sure i'll get a F9.. The reading comprehension was quite easy actually, but all the kanjis i dunno! cos i din bother to study haahaha... the listening comprehension was super difficult, and i'm not the only one that says that.. There's an open-ended section, which was super horribly difficult.. the person was speaking so quickly, that i could catch nothing! den i just anyhow write lor, haha definitely wrong de. 7 marks gone liao out of 22! BOO HOO... aiya hu cares la... it wun affect me in promoting rite? so i should just forget about this..

And I'm glad that out of the 9 ppl that we invited to join, only 1 is left for more persuading... the others accepted le! haha i managed to ask lyon to join us as cameo cca haha since like csc and dance shouldn't be too straining?

shall talk abt yesterday ba... yesterday had a meeting for publications, den reached home at 5 plus which was super late... den i realized that i need to air my karate uniform cos they are super smelly frm my sweat the day before yesterday.. den do here do there, den i committed a very serious mistake.. i on the internet explorer window.. den u can predict what happened, i left home late.. luckily i need not wait for too long for 112... den right after lesson ended, adeline called me.. saying that the proposal got problem and the teacher ms jennifer wu is talking to her on msn regarding this.. so my whole journey home was on the handphone with adeline.. OOPS.. even when i was shaking here and there on the stupid 147 bus that took super long to come.. and no seats somemore! den when i reach home, i cannt bathe lor... imagine i have sweated so much.. but i dun blame adeline la.. cos if i still went to bathe, sure cannot finish in time... so we discussed again.. den she re-did the 30-week plan and i re-did the objectives all that.. we did till 1 plus am lor... den i was super super super pissed.. i dunno why i'm the one doing all the work again.. but adeline like dun mind leh... am i really that petty? cos i dun wan to be like what i have predicted: i'll end up doing most of the work while others shake leg!

and oso i was printing 2 copies of the proposal which was 10 pages long.. end up i used 20 pieces of paper... den suddenly i recalled i had jap exam and won't be going to sch! so i told my mum that i would pass this to adeline in the morning at the subsidised bus stop before going for 3rd lang.. end up on the next morning, my mother shouted at me asking me to call adeline if she can meet my parents or not... den it's like i was talking to adeline on the phone with a toad's voice.. wah in a super bad mood la, first thing in the morning get scolded twice by mother... den later my mum left home in a rush that she even forgot to take my proposal!!!! lucky my dad was still around wearing his shoes, so i asked him to help me take lor.. den suddenly my mum banged on the door and scolded me for not giving her the proposal... -.-

den later come back, discuss the proposal again with mdm arfah... again, i realized many unconfirmed things.. den suddenly got very irritated! i lost my temper again at Chee Guan... dunno la, super annoying... it's like not enuff sleep, and dunno why i'm doing all these.. and what made me most mad is, after the first discussion, he dun wan to bring the paper for first discussion to sch again for me for reference. the paper contained what kenneth wrote for our aims and objectives... it's in pro language, and i definitely cannot do that... so when i was doing the proposal for the first time, i was super super super angry. cos i told him to sms me what kenneth wrote and he din do that. so i just had to write in what i can remember la.. end up today mdm arfah said the language got problem.. den i was very very very very very very angry. GRRRRRR it's not the first time liao lor... always 口说不做。dunno how this cca can survive... GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!

im losing confidence in this whole thing la.. den yesterday got quite troubled by the cca option form thing.. cos i wan to join maths and science council! it may help in my testimonial and i would like to take on research programmes... den now i'm tied down by this stupid thing... got very irritated again. i even wanted to quit air weapons lor... haiya! i still feel that i seem to be losing something if i dun try out other new ccas.. apparently very few ppl are staying in their junior high CCA as a core cca maybe except band. hopefully MSC can be taken as 2nd CCA!

and now another troubling question... subject combi.. i hope to have a 4H2 combi leh.. but i dun hav gpa 3.2! 3.06... gRRR i just need 1 C grade to be pulled up to a B grade den i can hit 3.2 le!!!!! hopefully LA or Chem can be moderated!!!!!!! den basically i tink i'll be going for science stream la... ya i noe i have to choose according to interest.. actually to tell the truth, I AM interested in science facts.. but dunno why i cant do well.. maybe my brain dun work fast enuff or i'm lazy to work hard lors.. cos science subjects require a lot of hard work and brain work. I know my abilities are oso not in science, but i do feel that i din work hard enuff.. My mum told me i shouldn't 逃避from sciences just because i cant do well for it... there must be some reason and one would definitely be SLACK! so it will more or less be confirmed at Maths, Bio and Chem. But i'm still in a dilemna to choose my subjects for contrasive subjects. history, econs or Chinese Literature????? if u ask interest, i have interest in all 3. If u ask abilities? I would tell u, i dun really have much abilities in these subjects except that maybe i would be more confident in Chinese Literature. HOWEVER, history will be able to help me in GP! so i dunno what to choose. econs sound useful oso.. den it's a lot of analytical work... quite similar in how history works... HAIZ DUNNO WHAT TO DO!!!!!!!

have to make the choice on 30th le!!!!! worrying worrying worrying!!!!! aiya.. but for now i tink i need sleep... cos tmr have piano! and i havent practised.. last week is public holiday, tink the teacher would definitely expect me to practise.. but i din! oops! dunno wat i was doing... havent been doing homework and stuff.. i dunno what i'm doing leh... i'm not busy... maybe busy watching tv or going out? oso not really lor... friends always cannot go out with me.. although today i went kbox from 5pm-9pm.. quite expensive lor... but nubbad la, sang quite a lot of songs.. den sang a lot of duets too! finally i can sing as a female voice!!! haha but it's only with "fake voice" cos my real voice is low.. den my "fake voice" sounds very childish.. den the chee guan said that im only suitable to sing cute cute songs which is so yucky. they said my singing is ordinary lor... so hurt!!!!! i wan to improve in singing!!!!! i always cannot find my correct key.. i can sing sing sing den suddenly jump a key! dunno why i have this problem leh... i tend to follow the original singer's key.. den it's most of the time either too high or too low... or i end up using "fake voice" all the way... haiz. only like liang jing ru's songs is sang most comfortably... but sometimes i use "fake voice" at the inappropriate parts... i can only find my key if i sing together with another person who oso have a quite low voice like Rebecca! OMG... haiz..... must learn to find key... but maybe it's because i have a large range! hahaha... as in... even though i'm using "fake voice" it's not really "fake" cos i still can go even higher which is then the "fake voice".. but normally when i talk everyone noes my voice is very low.. but when i start singing, the key will jump a few keys! also dunno why lor... i can sing sing sing with this key until i have to use "fake voice" which i'm not good at utilising... have to control all that... haiz hope that i can start learning singing soon to learn how to use my diaphragm to sing properly and to find my proper key and not change in all the time!!!! if not liddat how to sing well rite! :)

Tomorrow's the o level jap! and can you believe it... up to just now 10pm, i still dunno the syllabus, have to ask mei xue... so MALU!!! boohoo but nvm meixue is a nice girl..den after asking i realized i can see the o level ten year series la!!!! stupid rite!!!

today was a slack day. we had subject combi talk, cca talk, exhibition, blah blah... saw thru all the subject combi le, still in a dilemna! but at least i more or less know what i have to choose la... now have to choose between history or CLL as contrasive subject lor.. den cca.. there are really a wide array of ccas to choose from!!!! dunno what to choose! wanted ISAC de lor... but.. it has to be my core cca, so no choice lar! den i just realized that every category can only have 1 cca chosen!!! cannot 2nd cca be from the same category too! DIE LE!!! i wan youth flying club! how!!!

but anyway... kenneth, chee guan and i were supposed to go kbox.. end up the person said we could only sing till 5pm.. so chee guan said that it was bu zhi de.. and jurong actually had a lot of ppl, had to wait for rooms lor! so we went pizza hut for lunch.. den i realized kenneth is very greedy.. our meal din hav salad, but he went to take them!!! shhh hahaha.. but it's true lor.. nobody cares... tink i should have taken more servings of soup la! LOL.. den we started to talk about our coach for next year.. we cant make a decision! actually i'm ok with anything ba, more or less neutral.. i'm ok with safra and cdans too.. even though i hope that i can have a china coach, but i oso do hope that the coach will be caring too.. haiz super mao dun! we spent lotsa time talking abt that...

den later we decided to go back to kbox again!!! haha no rooms again.. the person said we had to wait till 5pm.. so we decided not to wait.. guess where we went next.. MACDONALDS! for ice-cream.. i tink going out with them, i'll gain LOTSA LOTSA LOTSA weight la!!!! den suddenly we got so excited again about the cca publications.. actually to be specific, kenneth wasn't la.. he was very shocked at our enthusiasm! cos we wanted to have this cca quite some time ago.. den we saw that it was in the list of merit ccas! haha den we were thinking of our proposal... den we oso wrote down a list of ppl who might be interested...

IT'S SUPER FUN! I'M LOOKING FORWARD TO THAT!!!!! haha.. even though there may not be many competitions which we can take part in, but i believe it'll definitely look good in the testimonial de! besides my core cca is still air weapons mah, should be able to get more points frm there ba! i realized ah.. chee guan definitely has much more enthusiasm than me.. he called me telling me to find out the ppl interested and to discuss more.. unfortunately he called me on hp! den it was super uncomfortable talking on hp, so i din have the mood to talk... we'll discuss tmr!!!! however, from the list that he told me that would be interested, there is someone which i'm not really on good terms with.. haiz.. anyway there are really really few ppl whom i'm on good terms with, so i shall try not to mind..

YAY!!!!! I tink there's a high chance that this cca can be set up.. cos of its feasibility! it was supposed to be set up, dunno what happened la... so we must try to start this project again! mdm ilyana said that we can have this cca.. if we have less than 20 ppl, we can talk to her.. which means 有得商量! yippeeeee!!! high chance of getting this cca set up lor!

anyway.. i just read a horoscope thing frm somewhere... it says that i'm actually good at scientific laws and theories leh... so does that mean i'm a science person?? haha..no wonder i'm not good at writing! LOL.. dunno got basis or not la.. but anyway i have decided to go into science le.. at least it would give me more career options even though my passion is still chinese.. but apparently chinese literature isn't quite alike to the chinese we study now.. so i should consider twice whether i should take up CLEP or not.. cos have to take either H2 CLL AND H3 CLL or H2 CLL and H1 CSC which i would definitely not want.. confirm wun take CSC le... don't think i wan to study about china all the time.. I WILL DIE. at least chinese literature is still quite interesting.. so if i can do well in science, i'll prolly aim for pharmacy or medicine if i can even cope! or if i still wan to be a chinese reporter for zao bao.. i believe publications should be able to help me.. anyway for university, don't need to have chinese literature in order to enter the chinese faculty, so should be no prob ba! so maybe... tentatively.. my combi will be.......

Maths, Chem, Bio, History.. i feel like taking all H2 levels.. but i dun hav 3.2 gpa! will they allow appealing or not arh... cos i dun feel like taking history at H1... cos i quite like history de lor... or if i can only take 3H2 and 1 H1, den i cannot take CLL le! cos CLL only offered in H2... haiz hope they will have moderation or something or allow me to appeal.. my gpa should be 3.06 ba.. at least i pulled up to a 3!!! work harder work harder!!! i really regret slacking my time away.. but i'm oso relieved that i managed to keep myself from someone at an arm's length... this person is in deep trouble liao.. failed a lot of subjects, tink this person won't even have a contrasive subject!!! dunno how this person is going to do le.. some ask me, aren't u worried for this person.. it's actually not whether i'm worried for this person or not... it's like, no use worrying for this person right? cos this person doesn't even care! from what i heard this person din even bother to study for eoys! how can expect to pass? at least i din really work hard for eoys rite, but i still listen in class.. this person din even listen in class, eoys din study, how to pass? at the very least i passed all subjects, except physics.. cos i din even care abt it.. i actually wanted to take physics de lor.. but haiz... i failed it, so cant take it le! :( so take chem and bio lor! good la, at least help me to eliminate a subject le! i have a feeling that i may develop passion for life sciences... or at the very least, i do have interest for sciences, but no passion yet la... cos all my passion were used up for chinese... hope i will be determined enough la!

heard today that the statistics for 4As in other JCs is quite high... which means i cant depend on results oso... cos i dun tink i can even get 4As either... so have to count on CCAs, CIP,and my interview skills le.. i flopped 1 interview, i shan't let history repeat itself! have an urge to join maths and sciences council cos it would definitely help in my testimonial... but won't actually a real research programme with external programmes help more? actually i would prefer youth flying club... cos i still believe that... since i'm born with good eyesight.. it's inherited... i believe that fate would like me to do something which requires good eyesight... flying is one i believe... dunno which are other choices... and oso since the horoscope thing says that i should be good in scientific law, maybe i should give up on the choice of being a lawyer! hahaha... just a crazy idea cos the pay is really good! but think maybe my language isn't that strong... i struggle quite a lot of history.. and chinese is i really have to work very very hard in order to achieve such results... haiz super tiring... dun hav talent for it means dun hav la.. just have to accept it lor.. and i can't possibly fight a case in chinese either... if i speak english, i get tongue-tied..how am i going to be a lawyer??? hahaha... maybe a doctor? or a pharmacist? or a pilot? but very few female pilots rite... but i always liked to try male-dominated stuff wat... if not i wouldn't have joined air weapons, i wouldn't have gone for karate... all male-dominated lor.. karate can the whole class have 20 plus ppl and only 3 females, not including me and Rebecca...haha isn't that male-dominated? must try new stuff ma! if not i would have joined chinese society or chinese orchestra le... capricorn are very conventional.. but don't think i'm conventional thinking from that point of view..

anyway.. friday have jap listening compre and reading compre... it should be easier to take la? but have to memorise kanji! but for tomorrow is compo! den i saw the format for the other paper... like nothing to prepare de lor... compo... tell me what i can prepare la! so this means that... TOMORROW DIE LIAO!!!!!!! i'm not sad at all leh.. haha dun feel anything at all.. haiz in holiday mood le la.. no exams!!! but have to do chem ws and chinese ws, oops! sorry father, wasted your money! :)

Shall blog a little before studying for Japanese! The exam's on wednesday... and i'm not a bit nervous.. think probably cynthia is studying even harder than me.. cos all the guidebooks and the examination itself costs money... but i'm not in the bit affected leh! oh dear!!! >.<

talk about today.. i went kbox today.. end up when we re-checked in for k student package, they said that we can only sing till 4.30pm! den i was so bushuang.. xueting kept telling me to complain... so we push the responsiblity to and fro.. and later i decided to go find out while she accompanied me.. so at first i was the one who asked and clarified, until xue ting opened her mouth and said "but your poster said 2-7pm wat. then isn't that cheating people!" haha den the person was so worried that she went to call, her supervisor probably? den the person decided to let us sing till 6pm..

then..... we were singing 其实很爱你by 张韶涵 until a blackout occurred!!!!!! funny rite... we were at the chorus part lor... den suddenly everything went dark... a lot of people screamed!!!!! den the kbox staff went to every room to announce that they are having a blackout and asked us not to be alarmed... actually before they come, we were continuing the last part of the song without the music lor... haha when the staff went away, we were like saying, we weren't in the bit alarmed!!! lol.. crazy over singing le la..

den, i was trying to persuade lyon to join air weapons! haha den xue ting chipped in too.. den we sang 西界by lin jun jie with music from lyon's mp3.. den it was back to persuading! den lyon suddenly said that wow it's 5pm already! the blackout occurred at around 4 plus liddat.. den i was so shocked that i had been persuading lyon to join air weapons for almost 1 hour! i was persuading her to join for around 1 plus hour thru msn yesterday.. haha i'm super despo la.. but she kept saying that she'll consider... >.< haizz disappointed!

but later the staff came again and said that the repairing may take some time... so their supervisor signed something so that next time we go we can have 2 hours extended! den i was saying that everytime there's something, it has to be at toa payoh! lol.. maybe cos we go there often ba?

tomorrow giving out the letters of invitation le... and i'm told that thursday will be the deadline for cca option... super worried! will we have all top 3 choices or not... >.< i'm not so worried for boys team, cos at least there's a team.. but for girls... there's only me!!!!!!! super worrying laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa... if any interested parties, pls don't hesitate to apply for us.. we'll accept de.. cos YAY! we don't need to have a fixed intake anymore!!!! YAY YAY YAY!!!!! for those who arent' really keen, like jolene... hmph just to tell u.. i'm told that the attendance for ccas will be flexible.. don't mind if you put air weapons as your 2nd cca.. even our training sessions clashes with your cca, you can go for ur 1st cca.. but intensive training during holidays you have to come la... not too overboard ba! cos nationals is very impt de! we really need you!!! you have the potential! so why not use it to help the sch to gain more achievements! we're a new set-up team, we need to have a good headstart! so please consider la!!!! 2nd cca oso nvm de!

Back to blog again!!!!

Still on the next year intake issue... haiz it's really worrying lor... i actually couldn't get to sleep last night because of that... hope our 1st 2 choices will consider joining, cos their standard is far better than the others >.< but of course interest matters too...

i have to study japanese!!!!!!! but cant bring myself to it... i'm having jap exam on wednesday... but tomorrow i'm going kbox from 11-7pm!!! hahaaha cos kbox has 5th year anniversary!!! all the packages at 5 dollars!!!! YAY!!! Lol...

Hope that the o levels will end too, so that i can really really relax... starting to have lotsa white hair le... :(

my 61st post! lalala...

I'm super sleepy... after karate... pulled a muscle somemore... feel like dying!!! haha but karate is still fun! love it man! tmr is the shooting workshop!!! hope that everything will go well...


now let me talk abt my exam results... the few subjects that shocked me was Biology and Language Arts... I din expect myself to fail the LA compre, but since everyone oso just passed, it's ok la... but my essay! the stupid vase gave me 14/25!!!!! for both essays! I HATE HER LOR!!!!!!! end up my LA just passed only... and ms yee din specially mention that my documentary is good... very worried that my film got very low marks! den i sure die le!!!!!! i really need LA to be pulled up an A, if not i really die le... cos i died for chem exam!!!!!!! i couldn't get a B... :'( can only settle with a C.. but luckily maths is two subjects... so i hav C for maths 1 and B for maths 2... if my LA can get an A, den i'll hit 3.2... pray hard pray hard...

now talk abt biology... i was really shocked that i can at least get 66, even though it's super lan already... u can see my previous entries... i really really really, really, i swear that i din study... i only studied properly till nutrition... end up nothing came out, which made me really mad... tot i would hav failed when i heard that there are 2 failures... but luckily it's not me! PHEW! quite shocked abt my results, cos i actually din study... and it's biology somemore, a memorising subject... it's a good thing that i still have my A... :) at least not that pathetic...

Physics was well... HAHAHA... i din expect to pass anyway, i din even study the main chapter magnetism... i dun expect to pass... LOL... but it's shocking that i actually got higher marks than last year! at least i din get a F... i got a D! lol but who cares... i'm not gonna count physics in anyway..

Chem was disappointing... but i knew i deserved this kinda result... imagine slacking the whole two years, den when tomorrow is the exam, i'm still slacking... den midnight den start to rummage through the notes... i dun expect to get high marks... true enuff.. but at least i din fail! so i should be thankful le... blame myself for not studyign lor... dunno why i gave up studying too... too lazy ba?

History was ok la... but quite disappointing, after comparing with other ppl... tot i would hav done better de... maybe it just shows that i'm really not humanities inclined... i cannot write as well as others... :( xue ting is very/quite science-inclined and she got higher than me... so this just tells me that i shouldn't go for humanities!!! somemore i failed my LA!!!!! last time i can get higher marks than xue ting de, and this time she got much much higher than me... so worrying!!!! i can forget about humanities le... i dun wanna die!!! and the stupid weifu... he's super er xin... he got 92 for history!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! he actually got full marks for the two essays u noe!!!!! so SUPER BIAN TAI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! haiz this kinda person is die die humanities inclined lor... BUT... his maths and sciences all very gd lor...except biology and physics... he gave up physics... but dunno what happened to his bio... he actually got lower marks than all of us!

chinese was... quite disappointing... but at least i still have an A... so i shall not complain... cos i tink that i should get higher marks for my zuo wen :(

maths was... ms low said i improved a lot frm last year... but i rmb last year i got about the same score!!!! quite disappointed too... but at least i still hav a B! i must work harder next year... i'm starting to feel that i'm getting the hang of it la... it's too late rite... but i must work hard!!!!!!!

overall... i only hope that LA will hav moderation... cos i'm not far away from A... i got 68.0 something!!!!! 2 more marks!!!!!!!! pray hard that there will be moderation... den can i get a 3.2... which is a minimum gpa... i aim for 4H2... hopefully i can make it!!!! i really wan to start afresh... hope i'll get a chance!!!!!!!

actually i sort of decided that i'll go for humanities... however after looking at my LA results, my chinese results and my history results, i do realize that i really cannot write well... even in chinese... cos my zuowen din score well!! my chinese only got 73... which is relatively low... even though history got a 74... but as compared to others, it's low!!!!! if i go for humanities, dun tink i can survive with the competition... cos i dun really like writing... even though xue ting and rebecca jus suggested me to go for humanities so that i'll be a reporter... but it's reporter for gossips... so it's smth like paparazzi!!!! lol but i dun really like to write leh... i dunno what i wan!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i just know that... everytime i watch 天涯侠医, i hav a very strong urge to be a doctor... i know very well that with my lousy results i cant... but i really would like to help people!!! with my knowledge... but i'm not a very sociable person... so i really dunno how la!!!!!

i used to think that i'm stronger in languages... but it seems like, no i'm not! look at how i write this blog and u'll know... i look at other's blog... they can hav poems, and they are all so shi qing hua yi... but for me? i really canot do this kinda thing, no matter how hard i try... and i really dun like to write essays...

maybe i should really choose sciences... chem bio or chem physics? and should i go LEP? i know chinese has always been my strongest subject, but I struggled a lot... i put in a lot of effort in chinese and yet my result is still a very very very little above average... or average... it may not be my strengths...

it's unbelievable... but i do think that there's a certain percentage that my strengths is actually sciences!!!!!!! even though i had always flopped my maths and sciences in primary sch and in lower sec... actually lower sec i did quite ok for maths and sciences la, average or a little below average... the reason that i can do well is it because i dun put in enuff effort? i wun bring myself to understand more and tink more... maybe cos i dun like to use my brain... HAIZZZZZ... what should I choose? i have to make my choice at the end of this month... i feel like i'm holding on to a time bomb... and the date is nearing... WHAT SHOULD I DO???? >.<

maybe i should really choose sciences.. to keep my options open... cos for science faculties, there are subject pre-requisites... but for humanities faculties, there are no pre-requisites... maybe GP only... so i should go for sciences rite? in case i wan to go into engineering or pharmaceuticals... or if possible... medicine..

is it because i have not been working hard, that's why i keep flopping my maths and sciences? but if i have to work hard to get gd results, then it shouldn't be my abilities! for some, maths and sciences just comes natually to them, but for me it's not... quite artificial in fact... it's hard for me to absorb all the science facts oso... and also to analyse... but undeniably... i AM interested to know more about science facts... but prob is the fact that i always cannot do well in exams just put me off.. but i oso shouldn't run away frm it because of that rite...

HAIZ i must make my choice clearly la! but whatever it is... i have to work hard!!!!! start reading newspaper, newsweek, times... haiz... going to use up a lot of money liao !

and next week got jap o level...and i havent study yet... i'm prepared to fail le ba???? OMG... better start soon... tomorrow? den 14th to 18th k box got 5th anniversary... 5 dollars only!!! i wanted to go everyday de lor... until xue ting reminded me that i still have my o levels... haha but heck care le la... if jap affects my higher chinese cert den i'll take higher chinese again!!!! hopefully i wun get a F9!

anyway i'm really sleepy... tomorrow hav to oversee the workshop too... gd nite! :)

i have been blogging a lot! haha 60 posts le! lol...

今天和雪婷林露去了esplanade, 墙壁上都是那些艺术家的杰作，好羡慕！看起来真得很美。我和雪婷有一起拍了一张照片，不过在林露那里，改次再放上来。。在通往mrt的隧道空无一人，看照片就知道了。有一种阴森森的感觉！不过也许是我多疑吧，他们两人都没觉得什么。还记得有一天，回家的时候，家里没有人，我就把所有的灯打开，结果哥哥回来的时候就把一些没有在用的灯关起来，然后问我“你看到了什么”。哈哈那时真想笑，如果看到了什么，早就跑路了啦！

刚刚原本写好了文章准备发了，结果发生了一些事，全都没了。我懒得再写一遍，反正多是在说今天发生的事，和选科的烦恼啦。

明天要和心媚刘佳林露雪婷去唱歌，好期待！我超爱唱歌！不过，嗨我还有日语考试得准备，听说那个人有在准备，真是贱人一个！讨厌死她了。害人家不努力，自己就乘机。过分！不过当然我最应该怪自己笨，上了别人的当！我后悔了，真的后悔了。真的不能交上损友，后果不堪设想！现在已是后悔莫及了。。。:'(

上星期六和天和妈妈到bugis the hotel inter-continental 住。很无聊吧，又不是旅客。哈哈不过不必付钱，因为妈妈是他们的会员。设备非常好！应该是五星以上吧！买了几份生日礼物，但还是不齐全！又另一个烦恼！我的白头发真的越长越多，烦！

我讨厌被人拒绝的感觉！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！


为什么没有人对射击有兴趣？？？？？？ 当每个人当着面对我说他们一点兴趣也没有，心真的碎了。因为花了好多时间讨论，安排。。 结果却是如此令人失望。是我人缘不好吗？希望别班的反应会比较好一些吧！　


























好了。。别想伤心的事了。接下来有好多好多照片！哈哈我不常这么做，不过看人家把照片放在博克里，好像很好玩似的！Drug design workshop experiment where we were decomposing an aspirin tablet...

去了药厂，大家都很帅吧！

我的另一个发型，有刘海比较好看，还是没有好看呢？

我们得套shoe-covers 才能走入这间房间呢！麻烦死了！

认得谁是谁吗？

我发现以上三张照片都有一个共同点，就是我的手势都很奇怪！第一张，明明是在写东西，可是不知道左手为什么无缘无故翘起来！第二张右手不知道为什么会紧握着？第三张，手看起来就是很不自然．．．


好了，先去看校花校草追赶跑，再回来继续，还有还得做elective 的功课！

YEAH! removed the navbar le... hahaha within how many minutes? whee... it's useful to check out the internet for instructions cos there will definitely be computer pros out there... :)

just changed my blogskin! haha finally! for 2 plus years le... the top is blocked by the stupid navbar!!! if anyone knows how to settle this problem, can pls tell me? u can tag at the tagboard! any comments are welcomed too!

These few weeks have been having drug design workshop as my elective! It's nubbad la, but apparently the lecturer is very very very boring!!!! And it's been a long time since I felt that I'm 发呆-ing when it appears that i'm very attentive! hasn't been paying much attention to the lecturer except for the 2nd day. The first day i fell asleep at the 2nd part, and 3rd and 4th day i was stoning. Today's the fifth day, we went to Beacons pharmaceutical! The visit's short la, and actually not very enriching... but it was an eye-opener! All the high tech machines, and all of us had to wear hair cover, shoe covers and a mask! haha everyone looks funny... And i was so glad that my mask din drop off because of the fact that i dun hav 鼻梁。hahaha... but i have to say, the practicals are very very nice!!! Can visit dinah's blog at everlasting-yourlight.blogspot.com to see the photos... im too lazy to take photos... >.< there was this practical, when we were decomposing an aspirin pill, then there was acidic fumes released which made everyone cough! dinah and I were the very first to smell it lor... we were like "what is that smell? what is that smell?" den starts to cough cough cough!! den everyone starts to cough... den everyone runs out, leaving me still standing on the same spot looking blur... lol.. luckily it's not poisonous! and apparently this spread to everyone else, when i said i'm from drug design, the others will say "oh, i heard that there was this experiment which caused everyone to get choked and run out of the lab" and the effect was really great, till the lab techs at the next lab got choked too! Thru this elective, i oso got to know dinah better! Still nubbad la... left 2 days only, must try to pay attention! and not forgetting to do my best for the presentation!

Next friday is the shooting workshop... and i'm super super worried because the response seems horrible... i only have jolene lai signing up!!! THANKS JOLENE LAI FOR YOUR SUPPORT!! but... it's really really sad! i have people telling me in the face that they dun wan to join, which makes my heart break into pieces.. i noe that this definitely wun appeal to many, but it still hurts me to see that after much efforts, most still dun appreciate... haiz what to do? hope that on 9 october when we collect the forms, there will be at least 20 people... or should i blame myself that i'm not sociable enuff? yongliang's class have ppl saying that they'll go as a form of support for him! Probably i'm too hateful le ba? That people dun hesitate to cross out the "interested" and hand it to me, as a form of "challenge". Dunno la, i like to think too much, please ignore me.

I wanted to go singing!!!! Then super super sianzzzzz... haiz have to wait till next week le cos no one can accompany me.. shall try to bug my mother to go with me tmr... haha den i dun nid to pay myself! i tink i'm getting addicted to singing le, especially after the last singing session with liu jia and rebecca... cos i really sang a lot... and it was only towards the end, that i finally got warmed up and can hit the high notes... i was like 走音-ing at the front part, so sorry to the both of them for causing noise pollution! Now i FINALLY noe, i MUST only choose easy songs at the front, den choose more difficult songs like zhang hui mei's song at the back no matter how much i like them... LOL, i take so long to finally understand this fact...

And... I LOVE KARATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! But I'm afraid that i will be like what rebecca is afraid too, we'll give up because of A-levels... hope that i wun... even if i would, it will only be temporary... i wan to work till black belt, cos i dun wan to mop floor!!!!!! LOL and i wan to be like the girl, and lead the others... :)


Ok, now talk about my o-level jap... IT WAS A TOTAL DISASTER!!!!!!!! I know the others oso said that they died, but i tink no one should get lower marks than me, because i withdrew from 3rd lang already... dun understand why i'm still taking o-levels? to b honest, i oso dunno myself... i was too foolish, i should have been decisive enuff to withdraw from 3rd lang at the start of this year, and not take o-levels... i'm just wasting money and make my higher chinese cert look ugly... if my jap gets F9, and my chinese can get at least an A, i will tear up the cert and take higher chinese next year as private candidate! ok back to the exam... the reading passage thing, the very first word was a kanji, and i din noe how to read that!!!!! around 50% of the passage i cannot read because they were kanjis... and i just kept skipping them, skip skip skip, then i was mumbling thru, cos i din noe how to read them... den i realized i was monotonous... it was HORRIBLE... i tink i would do even better when i was in sec1!!!! BOOOOO... den the asking questions part was equally horrible... i actually said i would study when during holidays... WHAT A JOKe... LOL... den the teacher asked me what i like to study... den is said i like to study languages... but apparently i said the wrong vocab which left the teacher clueless as to what i was talking about... she thought for a while before helping to correct me! In an exam... -.-" den i even said i dislike jap!!!! haha i said at first i thought jap was interesting, but now as jap gets more difficult, i dislike jap! den the teacher was like "dislike" haha, she was VERY shocked... den i said i like to go singing with my friends... den the teacher was like saying so you go to karaoke lounge bar often... of course i cant go often right? but i forgot the other adverb, so i just said yes... and the teachers were like looking at each other with that kind of "gosh, this is a bad student" look... haiz misunderstanding mam! After i stepped out of the room, i realized i din say good afternoon to the examiners, nor say thank you... SLAP ME... and oso, this has to be recorded!!! And they are still using casettes tapes... and i din noe how to use a casette recorder! LOL... den the teacher was like telling me the instructions in japanese... i gave her a clueless look, den the other teacher told her to use english... LOL... my jap is HORRIBLE... dunno why it came to this lor... it was still fine, quite good in fact during sec 1 and sec 2... until i start to pon lessons with cynthia... >.<>.<

Haiz, it's a bad thing, that you update only very frequently like me... cos the posts will end up being very very long! hope this is the last thing... I PASSED MY PIANO EXAM! 102/150!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BY TWO MARKS! WOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! SUPER LUCKY! Lalalalalala... that time, i heard some sec 1/sec 2 junior playing on the sch piano, exactly the same pieces that i played... at that point i knew that i would definitely fail my exam... haha I'm super thrilled!!!!!!!! will be upgraded to grade 7 le! haha den i'll soon leave piano... for violin!!!! haha but see how ba... cant be too greedy, cos i cannot do piano well... maybe i'm not musically inclined ba... but piano really improved my rhythm... at least, i noe how to follow the music when singing... haha liu jia needs to jia you for rhythm cos she always sings too fast!!!! den i have to tell her "too fast too fast!" but her singing's quite ok la... at least better than somebody... :)